


Cuddles Crushes and Olive Garden

by HamilFamBam (ThatOneGirl346)



Series: Hamilton Fam Bam Texting [5]
Category: Hamilton - Miranda
Genre: Alternate Universe - Modern Setting, Crushes, Multi, Platonic Cuddling, Sexual Content, Texting, i guess, if you blink you'll miss it but
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-08-19
Updated: 2020-08-19
Packaged: 2021-03-06 03:20:33
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 3,160
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/25996636
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/ThatOneGirl346/pseuds/HamilFamBam
Summary: Bebie Schuyler - i’m living for thisGod? - oh my god this is the best thing i’ve ever seen in my entire life.Johnny Appleseed - every other moment of breathing can leave.Mario.A - literally the entire class is trying not to laugh.Lizard Schuyler - even adams looks like he’s about to laughAngel Schuyler - whats?? Happening??JMads - highlights!
Relationships: Aaron Burr/Theodosia Prevost Burr, Alexander Hamilton/John Laurens/Gilbert du Motier Marquis de Lafayette/Hercules Mulligan, George Washington/Martha Washington, Maria Reynolds/Elizabeth "Eliza" Schuyler, Thomas Jefferson/James Madison
Series: Hamilton Fam Bam Texting [5]
Series URL: https://archiveofourown.org/series/1815370
Comments: 23
Kudos: 97





	Cuddles Crushes and Olive Garden

**Author's Note:**

> y o
> 
> Okay I know this chapters technically late but like, y'all can yell at me in the comments if you like
> 
> ALSO please read the note at the end

**Fam Bam Group Chat**

**Bebie Schuyler -** i’m living for this

**God? -** oh my god this is the best thing i’ve ever seen in my entire life.

**Johnny Appleseed -** every other moment of breathing can leave.

**Mario.A -** literally the entire class is trying not to laugh.

**Lizard Schuyler -** even adams looks like he’s about to laugh

**Angel Schuyler -** whats?? Happening??

**JMads -** highlights!

**Aaron Burr Sir -** so alex wasn’t wearing his glasses and he looked really tired and shit

**God? -** he walked in and jefferson was sitting next to me because i may or may not have been copying his homework..

**GWash -** Nice to know.

**God? -** oh shit nevermind that was definitely not happening

**Johnny Appleseed -** anywAYs he walked up to them, legit tripping like six times

**God? -** he was about to sit on my lap but he saw I was writing so he walked over to Thomas

**JMads -** and mumbled “laf” really quietly and climbed onto thomas lap

**Mario.A** \- Thomas was just confused for a minute while alex had his face like, fully buried into his chest.

**Real Sia -** don’t mind me just d y i n g

**Lizard Schuyler -** then alex pulled back a little and looked at jefferson really squinty and shit and said “why is your hair down?”

**Aaron Burr Sir -** So Thomas grabbed a hair tie and pulled it back and said “sorry love”

**God? -** SOUNDING EXACTLY LIKE LAF MIND YOU

**Johnny Appleseed -** alex looked at him for a little bit but you could Tell he can’t see shit so he can’t tell the difference

**Angel Schuyler -** where's Lafayette during all this?

**Johnny Appleseed -** pouting because he wants Alex cuddles but alex clings like a koala and won't let go

**Lizard Schuyler -** then he buried his face back in Thoma’s chest just like, fell asleep

**JMads -** class hasn’t even started yet lmao

  
**GWash -** I am way too lenient with you all.

**Mario.A -** that's true he just sighed and said that class was dismissed.

**Aaron Burr Sir -** we can either leave or hang out in here

**GWash -** my cars in the shop so I had to drive the van. Once the class is officially over do you want to go out to dinner?

**Johnny Appleseed -** I VOTE OLIVE GARDEN

**Johnny Appleseed -** ALEX IS ASLEEP BUT HE LOVES OLIVE GARDEN MORE THEN ME SO I KNOW HE VOTES OLIVE GARDEN

**French Fry -** olive garden is good

**Angel Schuyler -** are, not your students invited?

**GWash -** yeah we have to pick Martha up too so you can either come to my class now or I’ll pick you up.

**Angel Schuyler -** i’m r u n n i n g 

**Bebie Schuyler -** B R E A D S T I C K S 

**Bebie Schuyler -** thank you Washington

**GWash -** welcome

**JMads -** thomas can’t reach his phone bc of alex and I’m being mean to him and not giving it to him but he said that Olive Garden sounds great

**JMads -** I also vote olive Garden

**Lizard Schuyler -** I vote breadsticks all day any day

**Real Sia -** i’m down for whatever everyone else wants

**MWash -** i would commit arson if it meant i got breadsticks.

**God? -** TJAT IS NOT SOMETHING I EXPECTED FORM MARTHA

**French Fry -** don’t mind me just, d y i n g

**GWash -** oh my god Martha help me

**GWash -** they all just started whisper chanting breadsticks

**GWash -** everyone left is just staring at them

**GWash -** this is basically a cult

**GWash -** we’ve started a cult

**MWash -** I’m living for this

**Bebie Schuyler -** highkey im tempted to walk out of class

**Bebie Schuyler -** it’s almost over I think??

**GWash -** I will personally walk you back and make sure you sit ur ass down and finish your class.

**GWash -** OH MY GOD ANGELICA JUST BURST IN AND THEN STARTED WHISPER CHANTING BREADSTICKS WITH EVERYONE ELSE

**GWash -** everyone still here looks so confused

**Real Sia -** my class just got out and I’m legit running because I need this in my life

**GWash -** okay that was kinda cute

**GWash -** alex just shifted a lot and looked like he was about to wake up and everyone went silent and stared

**GWash -** then alex just like, cuddled closer to Thomas and everyone started chanting again

**Bebie Schuyler -** I want to be there so bad oh my god this is unfair.

**MWash -** I am legit tempted to uber over there because I want to see this.

**Bebie Schuyler -** pick me up please??????????

**MWash -** are you still in class?

**Bebie Schuyler -** its almost over but its like, halfway across campus

**MWash -** I’m taking an uber I’ll be there in like, six minutes

**GWash -** OH MY GOD THEODOSIA JUST RAN IN AND THE SAME THING HAPPENED

**GWash -** LEGIT NO ONE EVEN LIKE, WAVERED THEIR CHANTING

**GWash -** KIDS LOOK SCARED OH MY GOD

**GWash -** MORE kids just showed up?!? And are just?? Watching????

**GWash -** I’m quitting my job.

**Bebie Schuyler -** lmao I’m fucking cackling and everyone is looking at me like I’m crazy

**MWash -** I’ve apologized to my uber driver like 7 times because we’re just talking about the weather and I’m trying so hard to laugh

**GWash -** kill me.

**MWash -** no who else would make me food

**GWash -** is that the only reason you keep me around??

**MWash -** you also pick out really bomb sand squares at the beach

**GWash -** ah yes, the only things I am good at. Food and sand squares.

**MWash -** you love me

**GWash -** I do

**GWash -** it’s really inconvenient at times

**MWash -** rude

**Bebie Schuyler -** are you almost here?

**MWash -** we’re literally pulling up to the curb

**Bebie Schuyler -** ight cool let me say bye to sally

**MWash -** wait

**MWash -** is that the girl you’re talking to??!?

**Bebie Schuyler -** ?Yeah?

**MWash -** oh my god you’re adorable together you should invite her to come with us!!

**Bebie Schuyler -** first of all, y’all are fucking cRazy and I don’t want to scare her away

**Bebie Schuyler -** second of all, we’re just friends

**Bebie Schuyler -** third of all, I don’t even know if she likes girls

**GWash -** so you like her?!!?

**Bebie Schuyler -** I NEVER SAID THAT

**MWash -** oh you totally like her

**Bebie Schuyler -** NO I DON’T

**GWash -** waIT

**GWash -** whats her last name??

**Bebie Schuyler -** I’m not telling you

**GWash -** why not

**Bebie Schuyler -** you’ll use it against me

**GWash -** oh my god is it the Sally in my sophomore history class??!

**Bebie Schuyler -** no.

**MWash -** she just blushed it totally is

**GWash -** operation get Peggy a date is a g o 

**MWash -** oh hell yes I am making this happen

**Bebie Schuyler -** you most certainly are not.

**Bebie Schuyler -** no wait martha

**Bebie Schuyler -** martha please 

**GWash -** what’s she doing?

**Bebie Schuyler -** walking oVER HERE

**GWash -** lmao good luck

**Bebie Schuyler -** THANKS A LOT WASHINGTON

**Bebie Schuyler -** oh god

**MWash -** guess who’s joining us for dinner!!

**GWash -** oh hell yes this is Happening

**Bebie Schuyler -** why would you do this to me

**MWash -** torture.

**MWash -** also George we’ll be there in a few, sally included 

**GWash -** thank god people have started recording.

**MWash -** sucker

**GWash -** rude

* * *

**Sally-sbury Stakes and Margaritas**

**SillySally -** do you not want me to come? I didn’t mean to intrude I just didn’t quite know what to say when Ms. Washington invited me and know you look kind of uncomfortable

**SillySally -** I’m so sorry

**Bebie Schuyler -** nononnonoonnoononononononononononononononononono

**Bebie Schuyler -** you got that ComplETely wrong

**Bebie Schuyler -** this dinner is going to legit be like 15 people and all of them know me and All of them are very very embarrassing and like, I’m scared their gonna scare you off

**SillySally -** I wouldn’t be scared off that easily for one

**SillySally -** I’m also kinda excited to meet them you do a lot of stuff with them and like, they all seem really nice

**Bebie Schuyler -** I mean like, yeah they’re nice but they’re also a lot

**SillySally -** I am prepared 

**SillySally -** I have 11 siblings and all but two are older than me. 

**SillySally -** Each more extra then the other

**SillySally -** I am more than prepared for “a lot”

**Bebie Schuyler -** lmao you’re the third youngest? I’m the third oldest

**SillySally -** what a 

**SillySally -** coinkidink

**Bebie Schuyler -** never say that again.

**SillySally -** I will now say it ever day of my life.

**Bebie Schuyler -** I think it’s time to end out friendship

**SillySally -** you wouldn’t even think about it you Know that my notes are seven million times neater than yours

**Bebie Schuyler -** I’m being attacked

**SillySally -** that was the goal

**Bebie Schuyler -** rude.

**Bebie Schuyler -** lmao martha just called us out for being on our phones

**SillySally -** we should probably stop texting lmao

**Bebie Schuyler -** wAIT

**Bebie Schuyler -** okay so you might think this is weird but I have to double check because they’re legit some of my best friends in the world and if you’re mean to them I will l i t e r a l l y skin you alive with a cheese slicer

**Bebie Schuyler -** Hercules John Alexander and Lafayette (who uses they/them pronounce but they understand if you mess up as long as it’s not purposeful) are polyamorous

**Bebie Schuyler -** is that a problem

**SillySally -** not even slightly

**Bebie Schuyler -** you can keep your skin then!! :))))))))))

**SillySally -** YaY! :)))))))))))

* * *

**Fam Bam Group Chat**

**MWash -** we have arrived

**GWash -** they haven’t stopped chanting

**GWash -** it’s starting to get out of hand

**Bebie Schuyler -** mood lmao

**MWash -** why is there a shit ton of kids around the door?

**GWash -** they’re just watching

**MWash -** sucker

**Bebie Schuyler -** sally looks so confused why are you guys like this

**GWash -** oh shut up you do it too

**MWash -** caLLED O U T

**Bebie Schuyler -** I’m being attacked right now and I do not appreciate it

**MWash -** don’t be a baby

**Bebie Schuyler -** rude.

* * *

**Sally-sbury Stakes and Margaritas**

**SillySally -** why are they chanting?

**Bebie Schuyler -** don’t question it

**Bebie Schuyler -** Martha and George are highkey bullying me rn so like, what are your thoughts on joining the chanting??

**SillySally -** I’m down

**SillySally -** but also about dinner am I even allowed to go out to dinner with my history teacher?? I didn’t realize it was Mr. Washington,,,

**Bebie Schuyler -** lmao literally all of us have or had gwash for some class at some point at first it was like kinda awkward but he basically adopted Alex and Laf within like a month (even tho alex is still angsty about it cuz he has hella daddy issues, don’t ask) and they started hanging around his classroom with their friends then like the huge ass friend group formed (before i started school bc like they’re old and shit minus alex but he’s an over achiever) and like last week we went to see Hamilton together which we recently learned about and actually fun fact all the characters are like the dead versions of us apparently Anyways to sum that up gwash is chill and stuff and he’s probably going to pay for dinner so like even if it was weird which it isn’t because we’re lame and do things like family christmas photos now which is really lame but also kinda cute i’ll show you last years photo later if you remind me but yeah its not weird and its allowed

**SillySally -** I understood none of that but okay

**Bebie Schuyler -** free food

**SillySally -** ight I’m down

**Bebie Schuyler -** ight chanting time motherfuckers

* * *

**Fam Bam Group Chat**

**MWash -** we have lost our last two standing.

**GWash -** what do we do know??

**MWash -** there’s nothing we can do but

**GWash -** join.

**...**

**TJeffs -** do I have to carry him to the car?

**God? -** I would offer to take him but like, he c l i n g s 

**TJeffs -** so I’ve learned.

**Angel Schuyler -** WHY AM I JUST NOW LEARNING ABOUT SALLY

**Bebie Schuyler -** because I don’t have to share every part of my life with you

**Lizard Schuyler -** YES YOU DO WE ARE YOUR SISTERS ITS THE LAW

**Aaron Burr Sir -** as someone in prelaw I can confirm that it is in fact Not the law

**Lizard Schuyler -** shut up aaron its the sister law

**Angel Schuyler -** yeah shut up aaon my baby sister has a c r u s h and I’m just now learning about this

**Bebie Schuyler -** ITS NOT A CRUSH

**Mario.A -** yes it is

**Bebie Schuyler -** yOU DON’T GET A SAY 

**Mario.A -** yes I do

**Bebie Schuyler -** says who.

**Mario.A -** says me.

**Bebie Schuyler -** I guess I can’t argue with that

**Bebie Schuyler -** but ur w r o n g

**Bebie Schuyler -** I just like her as a friend.

**Angel Schuyler -** You more then just like her

**Angel Schuyler -** You like like her!

**Bebie Schuyler -** YOU’RE LIKE 37 YOU’RE TO OLD TO SAY LIKE LIKE

**Angel Schuyler -** I AM LITERALLY ONLY FOUR YEARS OLDER THEN YOU

**Lizard Schuyler -** stop denying the truth you like like her oh my god my baby sister like likes someone!!!

**Bebie Schuyler -** I hate you both.

**Angel Schuyler -** i’m using this dinner you two will start dating within the next three months and then you’ll get married and you’ll have such a cute little cottage in a huge valley somewhere and you’ll have goats and it’ll be so cute

**Bebie Schuyler -** did you really just plan out my entire future??

**Angel Schuyler -** yes, yes I did.

**Lizard Schuyler -** I am going to interrogate the life out of this girl I need to know if she is Right for my baby sister

**Bebie Schuyler -** I DON’T EVEN KNOW IF SHE LIKES GIRLS

**Mario.A -** Honey buns she’ll like you have you Seen you

**Bebie Schuyler -** you’re just saying that bc we look the same aren’t you

**Mario.A -** no ur fuckin hot boo

**Mario.A -** but like, you’re still a little innocent baby at the same time

**Angel Schuyler -** it’s just your vibe

**Lizard Schuyler -** ALSO YOU AND MARIA DO NOT LOOK THE SAME I WOULD NEVER HAVE SEX WITH SOMEONE WHO LOOKS EXACTLY LIKE MY BABY SISTER THATS W E I R D

**Bebie Schuyler -** one, E W

**Bebie Schuyler -** two, we look really similar

**Mario.A -** yeah like there are differences but their not big

**Lizard Schuyler -** they’re big to me

**Mario.A -** okay, love

**Bebie Schuyler -** ANYWAYS NONE OF YOU ARE ALLOWED TO TALK TO SALLY

**JMads -** so everyone’s just supposed to ignore her and not include her in any conversations??

**Bebie Schuyler -** okay no one’s allowed to interrogate her.

**Angel Schuyler -** I can’t make any promises

**Bebie Schuyler -** ALIRHEKJNFRKJBFVERKJDIERFLHNAENRGLIIIIIIIIFBKEJRF.LKAUHSKJU

**...**

**JMads -** oh my god that was the best thing I’ve ever seen in my entire life

**Angel Schuyler -** that s c r e a m

**Johnny Appleseed -** he tried to pull back but Thomas pulled the seat belt around them so they didn’t like, die and now he’s stuck

**God? -** this is the best moment of my life

**Little Lion -** hOW DID THIS HAPPEN

**French Fry -** you decided to Replace me.

**Johnny Appleseed -** ignore him he’s salty

**Lizard Schuyler -** you thought he was laf and fell asleep

**Little Lion -** I’m quitting my life.

**TJeffs -** you sat that like you haven’t been fucking attached to me for the last like hour

**TJeffs -** like we wont be stuck together for the remainder of this trip without martha beating us for not being safe

**Little Lion -** rude.

**Little Lion -** WHO’S THIS GIRL THAT I JUST MADE DEAD FUCKING EYE CONTACT WITH 

**Bebie Schuyler -** nO-

**Lizard Schuyler -** the love of Peggy’s life

**Little Lion -** i n t e r e s t i n g 

**Bebie Schuyler -** N O 

**...**

**Real Sia -** okay I’m live-tweeting this because all y’all are fucking ridiculous but also not paying attention to your phones

**Aaron Burr Sir -** rude

**Real Sia -** shut up Aaron

**Real Sia -** ANYWAYS BEFORE I WAS R U D E L Y INTERRUPTED 

**Real Sia -** angelica eliza and maria are lowkey interrogating Sally rn and i can’t tell if sally can tell or not

**Real Sia -** Jefferson and James are both just shoveling breadsticks into their mouths

**Real Sia -** the poly squad are literally all doing the fucking walrus teeth with their bread sticks and laughing like three years old

**Real Sia -** they’re also feeding each other the breadsticks and being sickeningly cute.

**Real Sia -** our dear Alexander also ordered off the kids menu the same thing Lafayette’s getting off the regular menu. It’s been confirmed he’s a five year old

**Real Sia -** Martha and George are just trying to eat their breadsticks in peace but This is happening and they look so disappointed

**Real Sia -** the servers also look very confused and a little annoyed because we have all eaten our weight in breadsticks and also when we showed up george just kinda really awkwardly went “can i um,,, get a um,, table for,,, fifteen,,,” exactly like that and the host person just stared at him for like forty seconds straight

**...**

  
  


**Real Sia -** OKAY THIS NEEDS TO BE IMMORTALIZED 

**Real Sia -** ALEX JUST FUCKING CLIMBED ONTO HERCULES’ LAP AND HELD TWO BREAD STICKS ON ON THE SIDES OF HIS FACE AND SAID “WHAT ARE YOU”

**Real Sia -** AND HERCULES GOES “A snack” AND FUCKING WINKED

**Real Sia -** THEY STARED AT EACH OTHER FOR A SOLID MINUTE BEFORE THEY BOTH GOT UP AND WENT TO THE BATHROOM

**Bebie Schuyler -** I’m traumatized.

**...**

**Real Sia -** UPDATE

**Real Sia -** THEY’RE BACK.

**Real Sia -** ALEX’S VOICE IS RASPY.

**Bebie Schuyler -** oh my god.

**Bebie Schuyler -** this is not the content i signed up for.

**Real Sia -** UPDATE TWO. HERCULES’ VOICE IS RASPY TOO I FEEL TERRIBLE FOR ANYONE WHO NEEDED TO PEE WHILE T H A T WAS GOING ON

**...**

**Real Sia -** okay I just looked at the bill.

**Real Sia -** this costs like, 362ish dollars.

**Real Sia -** now i see why we don’t go out together that often

**Real Sia -** also why the waiter looked physically scared when he asked if we were going to split the bill

**Mario.A -** dear god

**Little Lion -** why does no one else look fucking s h o o k

**Lizard Schuyler -** alex, love, I have 14 siblings. I’m used to this

**TJeffs -** 9 siblings

**JMads -** 13

**Johnny Appleseed -** I only have 4 siblings but we went out to expensive dinner parties a lot

**Aaron Burr Sir -** 1 but I had like 7 cousins who basically lived with us

**Real Sia -** 5 siblings

**Mario.A -** six sibs

**Bebie Schuyler -** sally isn’t in this chat but she has 12

**God? -** WhAt the fUCK

**GWash -** I had nine siblings

**MWash -** I got 7

**French Fry -** well okay then

**Little Lion -** what inclined your parents to have That much sex

**Angel Schuyler -** I never want to think about my parents having sex please never say that again.

**God? -** why on gods green earth did they not invest in like, condoms??

**TJeffs -** idk

**Little Lion -** I’m so done with y’all I just wanna go home and nap

**Little Lion -** someone cuddle me

**TJeffs -** you- I-

**Johnny Appleseed -** don’t question it

  
**French Fry -** I got him

**Author's Note:**

> This chapter took me awhile but also it's kinda longer so I hope that makes up for it.  
> I might not post next week bc I haven't finished the next chapter and it's gonna be at least decently long but also I have eye surgery tomorrow and I feel like it would not be in my best benefit to write high and/or within like the first three ish days after cuz my eyes will probably be absolutely fucked so that's fun.
> 
> oh yeah, the olive garden price, that is completely accurate I spent a full hour figuring out prices of food and drinks then taxes. That didn't even include a tip. Obviously my priorities are in the right place,,
> 
> Thank you so much from the comments and kudos they literally make my day!!
> 
> ANyways thank you for reading!! I hope you enjoyed!!
> 
> \- Becca from Beyond the Grave  
> <333


End file.
